One Hundred

This is SIB's 100th post. And I've only been doing this a few months. Man, I am one obsessive freaking fanboy. To celebrate, I give you 100 random things I love about Superman. If you manage to read the whole list without getting bored out of your mind you're more man than me.


001. The Mechanical Monsters!
002. Superman's Pal, Jimmy Olsen
003. Christopher Reeve's delivery of the "Truth, justice and the American way," line.
004. The 60's Filmation cartoon.
005. The DC Super Heroes action figure line by Mattel.
006. Beppo the Super Monkey.
007. Little kids wearing capes and making woosh! sounds.
008. Lex Luthor's power armor.
009. Reign of the Supermen
010. The adventures of Superman when he was a boy.
011. Mongul: Created by Jim Starlin to rip off Thanos from Marvel who was created Starlin to rip off Darksied from DC.
012. That people actually encourage me to keep this blog going.
013. That comic strip where Superman made "Stalin" fight "Hitler" to end the war in Europe.
014. Solomon Grundy.
015. Reading comics after school when I was 9.
016. The Amazing Story of Superman-Red and Superman-Blue!
017. Seeing people wearing "S" shield t-shirts.
018. Superman vs Muhammad Ali
019. John Williams' Superman theme.
020. All Star Superman #6


021. The Legion Of Super Heroes.
022. Tributes to the cover of Action Comics #1
023. He can fly.
024. The Atomic Skull. Not the character really, just his awesome, awesome name.
025. John Henry Irons
026. This JLA cover.
027. Stories by Elliot S! Maggin.
028. Metallo.
029. When people think Superman can fly because he has a cape.
030. The 80s/90s Superboy tv series.
031. This video.
032. Arguments about which was worst: Superman III, Superman IV or Supergirl.
033. Brainiac.
034. Brainiac's Skull Ship.
035. Superman beating Thor and Hulk.
036. His costume.
037. Superman Adventures
038. Bud Collyer and the way he changed his voice from Clark to Superman on the old radio show.
039. Grant Morrison writing him.
040. My Superman artist, Curt Swan.

041. The Fortress of Solitude.
042. Krypto!
043. Stories by Otto Binder
044. Livewire and Lori Petty's voice
045. The early 40s version of the character who fought crooked politicians and gangsters.
046. Manchester Black.
047. Krypton and things on it like Crystal Mountains, Atomic City and the Scarlett Jungle.
048. When he punches giant robots.
049. The story featuring tiny golden flying saucers from Atlantis.
050. Mister Mxyzptlk.
051. Superman as a super-genius.
052. The Supermobile.
053. When Superman shouts, "GREAT RAO!"
054. The "S" shield.
055. The near universal recognizability of the "S" shield.
056. Titano, the Super-Ape with kryptonite vision.
057. Red kryptonite transformations
058. World's Funnest by Evan Dorkin.
059. The Parasite.
060. The 70s Superman revamp.

061. When a comic is so good people say, "I don't normally like Superman but I loved _____."
062. Composite Superman.
063. George Reeves as Clark Kent.
064. Bizarro World.
065. Most versions of Supergirl.
066. The group of Kandorians who happen to look exactly like Lois, Lana, Perry, Jimmy and Clark and have formed a club based on those resemblances.
067. Birthright
068. The splash page in Birthright where we firs see Superman.
069. Superman volumes of Showcase Presents.
070. Terra Man, the evil cowboy from outer space.
071. The JLA.
072. Mxyzptlk V and Mxyzptlk 5, sibling descendants of Mister Mxyzptlk who look exactly like him. One good, one evil.
073. The animated version of For The Man Who Has Everything.
074. Superman by the Shame Idols.
075. The Iron Giant
076. The Superman/Darksied fight in the JLU finale.
077. The Superman Robot named Ned.
078. Mr. Majestic, Supreme, Samiritan, Sentry, Captain Marvel, Apollo, Hyperion, etc.
079. Superman For All Seasons
080. This image

081. The LL Ladies.
082. The Clark/Lois/Superman love triangle.
083. The Clark/Lois marriage.
084. REM's version of Superman.
085. The Mystery Superman from AD 4500.
086. Mercy Graves
087. Superman having adventures all over the universe.
088. Superman and the Mole Men
089. The Phantom Zone.
090. Conner Kent, Superboy.
091. This Lois Lane cover.
092. This one too.
093. Superman flying through the time barrier under his own power.
094. Brainiac's rival Grax. He's not as smart, but he has 4 arms!
095. It's Superman by Tom De Haven.
096. John Byrne drawing him.
097. Mike Wieringo drawing him.
098. Those brilliant covers by Neal Adams.
099. The Supergirl Meme.
100. General Dru-Zod.

Ladies Love Cool James

The 10 Worst Moments in Superman History, a series

"So then Richard Pryor exposes Superman to imperfect synthetic kryptonite which causes him to become a drunken asshole!"
Superman III

No jokes or explanation, that's exactly what happened.

Pick up sticks

Al wonders if Kwik-Key is as good as they say.

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Chris C
Oh! That reminds me, I need to add choke Dan Jurgens to my to do list.

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Henry Blanco
They had rocket powered belts.

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Sergio Calvet
I shouldn't play favorites, but this is one of my favorites.

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Chris C
I am hesitant to include the big boob joke.

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I love these. Please keep sending them.

The 10 Worst Moments in Superman History, a series

"So get this, Superboy's going on a rampage against a bunch of DC's superheroes. He's kickin' and zappin' and punchin'. One the heroes he punches? Some forgotten Teen Titan. And he punches her so hard, he knocks her freaking head off!! Now we know he means business!"
Infinite Crisis #7


Man. Okay, so DC's latest big crossover, Infinite Crisis, needed a villain. Well, big cosmic villains have been done. They needed some one with more personal reasons for wanting to make DC continuity make even less sense. Some one you'd never expect to see ripping arms off. So what'd they do? They took Superboy Prime, a Superboy from another world created for the first Crisis crossover, and had him go nuts because, get this, the world was too dark and he wanted to make the world perfect so he could be Superman there.

First step? Go after Kon El, the current Superboy and let him know he's been replaced. But because he's crazy, a fight ensues. Thing is, Kon El's a Titan, so every one comes out to help their friend. And Superboy Prime, a version of Superboy, the picture of innocent fun super hero stories, slaughters them.

You know, I got no problem with gore in comics. I love zombie flicks, I'd be a giant hypocrite if I went on about the genius of Romero and then decried something like it in comics. My problem is using freaking Superman characters to tell this kind of story. These were kids characters once. I don't want to see this for the same reason I don't want to see Bugs Bunny take a chainsaw to Foghorn Legohorn and wallow in the resulting viscera or see Goofy rape Minnie Mouse.

This thing isn't any kind of uncommon at DC today. It would be nice if I could share my comics with my nephews without worrying they might see Superboy burning a superhero in half with his heat vision.


They sure are, kid.

I love that I keep getting these.

Jesse Farrell drew Zod. Get it? Dru-Zod! Ha! That's gold. I've amused myself.

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Jesse Farrell
He also drew Superman. HA! Wait, that one doesn't work.

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Jesus Torres
Jesus also drew Zod! Ha! Yeah, that's the stuff.

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Tim Lee
I wish emo Bizarro was my lawn so it'd cut itself.

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Your continued submissions are encouraged.

More sticks!

Jesse Farrell finds Gene Hackman pretending his real hair is a wig sexy. Takes all kinds, I guess.

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Johan Åberg
The beginning of the end. Of DC comics that make sense. I love the cover recreations so much.

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Jesus Torres
You can't see Star Boy's body cause they're flying through space.

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Joanna
Love is in the air.

Alex Ross and Jim Krueger's Justice

Jim Krueger: So here's the pitch, Dan. It's a JLA story, only set in in the Super Friends world.

Alex Ross: Challenge of the Super Friends. None of that silly BS from the regular Super Friends. I'm a serious artist.

Jim Krueger: Right Alex. Thank you for correcting me Alex.

Alex Ross: And...

Jim Kruger: And my career in comics, Alex. Thank you for my career in comics. So get this, Dan, it's the Legion Of Doom vs the Super Friends, BUT! the art is rendered so darkly you can barely make it out.

Alex Ross: I assure you the art will remain as stiff and flat as Hanna Barbara and God intended, though.

Jim Kruger: Yes! You truly are a man of vision, Alex. But that's not all, this is where we're really thinking outside of the box, it's the Super Friends, BUT! there's sex and blood!

Dan Didio: Sold.

Plumbers, what do they know?

Little known fact: Mario hates Superman.

I sense a lack of sincerity.

This is Bruce Timm's face as he describes the upcoming Superman/Doomsday animated film as "very exciting."

This is one of approximately fifty kabillion comic blogs

And they all post funny old panels from the silver age, including this one.

Nine times out of ten on other blogs, though, it's to make fun of them. But not here. When you see me post a picture of Perry White in a silly costume or something crazy from an Otto Binder comic, don't think for a moment I'm laughing at it, I'm laughing with it because i love that stuff. It's fun. Those things were meant to be insane and out there and designed to make kids imaginations go to wild places.

This blog celebrates crazy and ridiculous. Crazy like Superman pounding Luthor into the ground like a fence post.

Just thought I'd share that.

A brief history of the Maid of Might

Supergirl was a victim of DC's universe re-ordering story Crisis on Infinite Earths in a lot of ways. Her history isn't the most convoluted ever, but it's not exactly straight forward. So a brief (much briefer than the Zod post, I swear) clarification of Supergirl's story, because I see the question "How many Supergirls have there been now?" a lot. The answer's four, if you don't want to read this whole thing.

First we have Kara Zor-El. When Krypton exploded, an entire city, Argo, survived adrift in space. In this city was Jor El's brother, Zor El, and his family. Sadly, the hunk of Krypton that Argo was situated on was slowly turning into Kryptonite and poisoning the citizens. Zor El, not wanting his daughter to suffer the fate of the rest of the city, sent her to earth to be with her cousin Kal.

Superman found her and helped her adopt the secret identity of Linda Lee, an orphan in the town of Midvale. She operated in secret, learning to use her powers safely. She was later adopted by the Danvers, giving her a new family on Earth. Over time she'd go from being "Superman's secret weapon" to public hero as highly regarded as her cousin,
growing from a teenage girl to a young woman in college (where she would make a number of terrible fashion choices).

She died saving the universe in Crisis, leaving all the people of the world to forget she ever even existed when the universe was started over and a new time line established. Her spirit would live on, though, literally, with her ghost making a couple of appearances in later stories.

(I should also mention Power Girl, here. Power Girl is the Kara Zor-L of an alternate dimension that was destroyed during the Crisis, but she managed to survive and find herself in the new universe that formed after. For many years her origin was in doubt, but it's now been revealed that she is in fact a survivor of a lost universe in the current version of DC continuity. I'd include an image, but I swear it's damned near impossible to find one on google that doesn't border on pornographic.)

John Byrne introduced a whole new character called Supergirl when he re-invented the Superman mythos. A rule was in effect that said there were to be no survivors of Krypton besides Superman, so Byrne's had nothing in common with the original besides the name and and a feminine version of Superman's costume.

Byrne's Supergirl was from a universe created by the Legion of Super Heroes villain the Time Trapper. She was an artificial life called Matrix, created to find the Superman of the regular DC universe and recruit him to save her own. Superman's help would come too late, and that universe would be destroyed. Matrix was the only survivor, trapped in Superman's universe.

Superman brought her to his adoptive parents, and they helped her adjust to her new life. She used the name Supergirl in honor of Superman and the Kents.

As an aside, it would be this Supergirl who wears the most famous and iconic Supergirl costume. Kara wore something very similar, but not quite the same. Yup, the 'real' Supergirl only wore the suit that's most famous in the god awful film adaptation.

She found her way into Lex Luthor's arms (at this time Luthor was in a new young body he'd cloned and presenting himself as a legitimate businessman. We won't go into that.) In the end, she saw Luthor for the villain he is and move on. She continued her super hero career until one day she was asked for help by the parents of a girl named Linda Danvers.

Linda Danvers was a bad kid and who had fallen in with the worst possible crowd. In rescuing Linda from them, Supergirl was injured. In a moment of desperation, Matrix merged her shapeshifting body with Linda's, who was all but dead, and the two became one person. The memories of both girls, but with one new personality.

(This new combined Supergirl would have much stronger ties to the original. The spirit of the original Kara Zor-El would visit her, informing her she'd been watching over the young Linda Danvers as she grew up. Linda would also team up with a young Kara Zor El from the pre-crisis universe when a villain would draw that Supergirl from her world.)

Eventually the the two beings would split again; Matrix leaving the name and Supergirl powers (minus the shape shifting) behind with Linda. (Linda adopted her new costume after the split, before her final farewell to Matrix.) After several adventures Linda retired, feeling she was not fit to be part of the Superman legacy.

Pointless trivia! At 80 issues, Linda Danvers has had the longest run in a comic with the title Supergirl. If you add up the original Kara Zor El's appearances as a regular feature in Action Comics, Adventure Comics and her two solo titles, she surpasses that.


The fourth Supergirl was short-lived (and pretty unpopular). She's not much more than a footnote.

Her name was Cir El, and she claimed to be Superman's daughter from the future. She was actually a girl named Mia that a future version of Brainiac had altered with Superman's DNA and sent back in time carrying a disease to destroy humanity. She died erasing the future that created her to save the world.

I have to confess to liking the costume, though.





The Supergirl appearing in funnybooks these days is an updated version of the original. She's Superman cousin from Krypton, but much darker. I don't like her much at all.

That's changing though. She's been written terribly in her own comic, but much better in her appearances elsewhere, and the most recent issues of her own comic seemed to be bringing about positive changes for her there.






There is one more Supergirl of note; the Supergirl of Superman The Animated Series and Justice League Unlimited, Kara In-Ze.

The cartoons had the same rule as the comics of the time, only Superman could be from Krypton. So that Supergirl is from Krypton's sister planet Argo. Argo was destroyed in the wake Krypton's explosion. Kara's family had time to prepare, and put themselves in suspended animation. Superman would discover them while exploring the ruins of Krypton, but Kara was the only survivor. He brought her home to the Kents, and they all became her new family.

I really like this version of the character, and I guess lots of other folks did too, because her look would be adopted for the then current regular continuity comics.

So there we have it. In short, we've had 4 Supergirls:

1 The original and current, (with some differing details) Kara Zor-El, Superman's cousin who survived the destruction of Krypton and plays good guy here on Earth wearing her cousin's shield.

2 Matrix, the shapeshifter from another dimension.

3 Linda Danvers, who merged with Matrix and continued with the name after they split.

4 Cir El, the victim of Brainiac's manipulations. Who was never much of a Supergirl at all.

One more time!

Al feels the people from the Bottle City of Kandor are poor planners.

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Casey Ontiveros
Some of these have been way too classy. I almost feel bad for wasting people's talents on my silliness.

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James Figueiredo
SUPREME! SAMARITAN! SENTRY! APOLLO! Every one a style biter!

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Eugene
Frank Miller sucks.

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I did this one.
It's Superman and the Superman Emergency Squad.

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Carlos
He is all about the romance, our Spanish friend Carlos.

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Your continued submissions are encouraged.

Stick figures! More of them!

Dan Jurgens you just got schooled and the principal is Johnny Zee.

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Ed C
Omega beams do not miss!

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Jessica K
This is the first Mxy so I love it best.

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Max S
Superman's bewilderment amuses.

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Chris C
Oh no! Kryptonite!

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Your continued submissions are encouraged.

Father/Son bonding.

Elder Mr Denton: Why do you have so many figures of Superman in just his regular suit?

Younger Mr Denton: Well this one is based on the animated series, this one on the JLU series that followed it, this one is meant to be a classic design from the comics, these two from specific eras of the comics, that one's from the recent film...

Elder Mr Denton: You have OCD. Got it.

These are brilliant and I love them

That's by Steve Sensible. It's genius I feel, as are the rest of these.

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Ian Sokoliwski
Superman shouting at kids is funny.

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Ryan Landau
Cockblocked!

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Russell Hillman
He's got his signal watch! That's my favorite bit.

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Henry Blanco
Henry's amazing choice of characters makes me happy all over.

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Erin
I do not agree with this at all.

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Youri Zoutman
Supes got game, homie.

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Your continued submissions are encouraged.

A week of SUPER-TURTLE! Day 7

People who hunt for sport suck, Super-Turtle knows the score.

Little tiny supermen

Used to be when Superman got in trouble tiny men in Superman suits would fly from the little city he kept in his Fortress and rescue him. I love that.

This will probably only be funny to me

I like Superman. I think stick figures drawings are funny. I would like you to draw a stick figure drawing of Superman or Supergirl or Jimmy Olsen or whatever Superman character you would like doing something. I will then post them on this blog and giggle like a little girl while doing so because I am easily amused.

A week of SUPER-TURTLE! Day 6

Jimmy Olsen - 1, World's Finest - 0

Jimmy Olsen: kicking ass and taking names.

A week of SUPER-TURTLE! Day 5

Heh, no one thinks these are funny but me.

Push out the jive, bring in the love

Contrary to popular belief, I do not automatically hate everything Superman published after 1985. So in the spirit of celebrating things we love, I give you some Superman stories printed in the last 20 years that I love and feel are amongst the best in all his 70 years.

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Superman For All Seasons
by Jeph Loeb and Tim Sale



More than any other story, this makes Byrne's versions of the characters work. It's a human story, but Superman never loses his air of grandeur. Three of the four chapters are told through the eyes of a member of the Superman Family, and one from Luthor's perspective. Reading this it's not difficult at all to understand why the people closest to him love him the way they do, or why Luthor hates him as he does. The art is perfect for the story, it's warm, with figures that are caricature enough to make them feel like they're a part of a different world, but not so much so they become silly or unreal.

This is one of my favorite Superman stories ever, and the one I share with people to try to make them understand why I love the character. I can't begin to recommend this one enough.

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Birthright
by Mark Waid and Leinil Yu



This is without question my favorite version of Superman's origin ever. Combining elements of everything that came before, this Superman is my Superman.

He's absolutely modern without betraying the idealism of the 60s version of the character. For me, Mark Waid writes the perfect Superman. He's the sort of Superman who will save the day and throw you a knowing wink before flying off to help some one else. He's human, and like all of us some times feels like an outsider, but is never maudlin because despite that he knows how amazing the world is. He's smart, charming and more than anything he wants to help.

This Luthor is so layered. He's cold and calculating, but occasionally absolutely mad. He's the smartest man in the world; unfortunately, he's also obsessive, paranoid, power hungry and arrogant.

And he is full of hate.

The art on this one! Man is it great. Yu's Kryptonian designs are the coolest that have ever been. Yu's style is unique and exciting and perfect for action sequences and the quiet scenes.

This one works on for me on every level.

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Secret Identity
by Kurt Busiek and Stuart Immonen



A kid in the 'real world' named is named Clark Kent and hates it every bit as much as you would expect every kid with a 'fun' name would.

He discovers one day that he has the powers of his comic namesake, and learns what it means to use those powers to help others. Busiek creates a character you can relate to on the most personal levels, and that makes the escapist fantasy so much stronger than usual. The joy we see in this Superman's powers and adventures is so easy to connect to.

Immonen's art is perfect as can be for the story. It's beautiful and feels real. The colors and inks give it an amazing texture and weight, objects seems as though you could reach in and feel them. The body language of his figures is expressive and natural, and every face is unique. Immonen is one of the best working today.

I'm not doing it justice in that lame little summary, but it's one of those rare stories you hear a lot of comic fans say, "I don't usually like Superman, but I really liked that."

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What's so Funny about Truth, Justice and the American Way?
by Joe Kelly and Doug Mahnke & Lee Bermejo



This is a story about abuse of power. Superman confronts a team of people with super powers who are executing criminals called The Elite. They're arrogant, destructive and feel they don't have to answer to any one.

They laugh Superman off as outdated and irrelevant in today's world. They push him and taunt him and goad him into a confrontation. Superman faces them on their own terms and shows them how horrifying their methods really are, showing them that you can help and stand up to those who would do wrong without killing them are going outside the law. There is a line that shouldn't be crossed, and Superman proves you don't have to.

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Kingdom Come
by Mark Waid and Alex Ross



This may be one of the most famous Superman stories ever. It visits the future of the entire DC universe, but at its core it's about Superman; who he is and how he fits into the world.

It never really feels like the silver age Superman to me; at times it's very much the post-reboot version of the character, and at others it has hints of the golden age Siegel/Shuster/Fleischer Superman. It's surprising to see that from a project by two creators so known for their love of the silver age.

This is a Superman who can't deal with the tragedy of losing the most important thing in the world to him, and ultimately has to learn how important he really is. Yeah people are basically good, but they can be overwhelmed by world. When Superman lets that happen to him, things become bleak. It's about Superman as a symbol of hope and how he inspires people to be the best they can be when they don't have that strength on their own, or have simply never seen that's the way things can be. It's about how important that role is.

We don't have to have a Superman to show us how good we can be, but it feels good when we see some one who can do anything, and what he chooses to do is the right thing.

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A week of SUPER-TURTLE! Day 4

Superman's a rock star

Superman is an immediately recognizable and powerful figure. He's a bundle of fantasies every one has had; we all wish we could fly, or see through walls or hear conversations miles away.

Because he's a familiar dream, hacky songwriters looking for a lazy analogy have abused him like Michael Moore abuses ham; grossly and for decades. There are approximately 50 million songs that reference or are about Superman. They're almost all bad.

And now you have to listen to them.

(If you're reading this from work, be warned some of the language and links in this one aren't family friendly.)

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Song: Jimmy Olsen's Blues by The Spin Doctors

Sample lyrics:
He's leaping buildings in a single bound
I'm reading shakespeare at my place downtown
Come on downtown and make love to me
I'm jimmy olsen not a titan, you see
He's faster than a bullet, stronger than a train
He's the one who got lucky got his cape around miss lois lane

Why I hate it:
The amount of airplay this song got in the early 90s ranks amongst humanity's most baffling and heinous crimes. The basic premise of the song is that Jimmy envies Superman's relationship with Lois and wants her for himself. He then proceeds to whine about it, the gist of his argument being that Lois should be with him because he's not as good as Superman. That's stupid. You're stupid, Spin Doctors.

If you're wondering whatever happened to these guys, I heard John Popper of Blues Traveler ate them when the tour bus they were sharing stalled on its way to Arby's.

Is that my second fat joke in this already? I may have some self-loathing issues.

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Song: Kryptonite by 3 Doors Down

Sample lyrics:
I took a walk around the world to
Ease my troubled mind
I left my body laying somewhere
In the sands of time
I watched the world float to the dark
Side of the moon
I feel there is nothing I can do, yeah

Why I hate it:
Oh what the hell does that mean? NOTHING, that's what. The chorus goes on about how awesome the guy is, then all out of now where he yells KRYPTONITE! For no reason!

I'll keep you by my side with my superhuman might. Kryptonite!

If you can explain the lyrics to this song to me in a way that makes them not seem like the most retarded thing that was ever retarded, I will give you one million dollars and sleep with you many, many times.

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Song: Even Superman Shot Himself by Powerman 5000 (You owe youtube a thank you for not having this one.)

Sample lyrics:
Takin' you out superhero style your finger's on the trigger
Wishing you were bigger all the while you've got the soul with rigor mortis
Like Travis Bickle said, "Suck on this"
You've got the soul with rigor mortis
Suck on this
The grip on the neck and the snake bite kiss

Why I hate it:
Really Powerman 5000? That's what you want to put out there with your name on it? Powerman 5000 is the band headed by Rob Zombie's little brother. See why nepotism is bad? You get a relative a job and he just embarrasses you. And when you're Rob Zombie, the guy who wrote a song called "Pussy Liquor," that's a pretty damned amazing feat.

I think this song is about George Reeves heavily disputed death, which may or may not have been a suicide. I don't know, it was hard to tell through all the stupid.

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Song: Superman by Eminem (really, really not work safe)

Sample lyrics:
They call me Superman,
Leap tall hos in a single bound,
I'm single now,
Got no ring on this finger now,
I'll never let another chick bring me down,
In a relationship, save it bitch, babysit? you make me sick,
Superman ain't savin' shit, girl you can jump on Shady's dick

Why I hate it:
Now there's just no call for that. We get it, Eminem, you're ridiculously insecure and have to tell the world how you don't need them bitches because you're such a man. Please stop.

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Song: Superman's Song by Crash Test Dummies

Sample lyrics:
Superman never made any money
For saving the world from Solomon Grundy
And sometimes I despair the world will never see
Another man like him

Why I hate it:
Because admitting I actually like a Crash Test Dummies song is embarrassing as hell. But it mentions Solomon Grundy! That's pretty cool, right? And that Mmmm Mmmm song they did? That was pretty big song for a while there, you remember that, don't you?

You know what, screw you, I don't have to justify myself to you.

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Song: Superman (It's Not Easy) by Five For Fighting

Sample lyrics: Oh you're getting all the words to this one. Because listening to these songs has filled me with hate.

I can’t stand to fly
I’m not that naive
I’m just out to find
The better part of me

I’m more than a bird...i’m more than a plane
More than some pretty face beside a train
It’s not easy to be me

Wish that I could cry
Fall upon my knees
Find a way to lie
About a home I’ll never see

It may sound absurd...but don’t be naive
Even heroes have the right to bleed
I may be disturbed...but won’t you concede
Even heroes have the right to dream
It’s not easy to be me

Up, up and away...away from me
It’s all right...you can all sleep sound tonight
I’m not crazy...or anything...

I can’t stand to fly
I’m not that naive
Men weren’t meant to ride
With clouds between their knees

I’m only a man in a silly red sheet
Digging for kryptonite on this one way street
Only a man in a funny red sheet
Looking for special things inside of me
Inside of me
Inside me
Yeah, inside me
Inside of me

I’m only a man
In a funny red sheet
I’m only a man
Looking for a dream

I’m only a man
In a funny red sheet
And it’s not easy, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm...

Its not easy to be me

Why I hate it:
The whiniest lyrics I've ever heard sung by a man in a falsetto. And that's douchiest haircut I've seen all day, Five For Fighting singer guy. The only fighting these guys are doing is fighting is the urge to put on little frilly dresses and discuss their feelings. Man the hell up.

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So there we have it. Pop music uses Superman to rape your ears. Bad pop music! Bad!




PS. I love this.

A week of SUPER-TURTLE! Day 3

I have nothing clever to say

A drunken/high/something Adam West in a jogging suit and a Batman mask whores himself to a local wrestling promotion, stumbling through his lines in an interview. Then the fat redneck wrestler that used to do that bit with Andy Kaufman shows up dressed as Superman.

And the car show they'll both be appearing at gets a plug.

A week of SUPER-TURTLE! Day 2

Super-Turtle, the origin!