"So this is thing. Superman's a great character and all, but he's missing something. What's that? Guns. Big ones."
Superman At Earth's End
Oooh, Elseworlds. I like those. I've never heard of Tom Vietch or Frank Gomez, though. I wonder what that big metal tumor is.
Is that Superman? He looks very much like my Uncle Bill.
Oh. It is Superman. He's sure become shouty in his old age. And significantly more lungey.
Wait, is he punching some one's guts out while screaming about being a man? Did Frank Miller write this?
My Uncle Bill got like this when he was in his later years. Thought every one with a mustache was his brother Catfish.
Yeah, Bill talked to himself a lot, too.
Batman kept some weird freaking souvenirs.
Uncle Bill repeated the obvious all the time, too. One more of these and my family is suing for royalties.
You know what? Stop it. Stop it right now.
Nazis? Why are there nazis?
If I had a nickel for every time I've had to say that.
Oh, of course. There are Nazis because Hitler and his twin brother are the villains. YOU STOP THIS RIGHT NOW, TOM VIETCH!
NO. WRONG. BAD.
Why don't you see if you can find the mortal remains of Tom Vietch's sense of decency while you're in there, Supes.
NO! I SAID NO! YOU QUIT IT!
When did this turn into Republican anti-stem cell propaganda?
Please don't, Superman. Please.
And you did it any way. I SAID PLEASE!
Wait, didn't Superman punch that guys guts outs because they couldn't resolve their ideological differences? Why are you leaving the kids with him?
Yeah, I'd kill myself if I were in this comic, too. Godspeed, Supes.